Part 7

The brown water splashed against the hull. Tom and Duncan sat quietly at the bow. Only the clicking of their fishing reels broke the silence. Duncan smiled at Tom, and then into the sun, and the wind swept across his content face.

“It’s a beautiful day, Dad.”

“Yes, it is,” replied Tom and cast the red jig back into the water.

“I’m sorry, Dad. I’m sorry for everything. I wish I were a different man. I don’t wish you to bear this cross,” Duncan said without looking at him.

“I know, son. The fish should be ready. Let’s eat and have a drink,” Tom said. He put down the fishing rod, and disappeared below deck. He came out with a fish steaming in tinfoil and beers. They sat, ate, and drank.

“I love you, son. I did the best I could.”

“I know, Dad,” replied Duncan and yawned.

“You know, your nightmare?”

“The screaming man and the dark figure?”

“Yes.”

“He still comes at night. The headlights, the dark figure, and the screaming animal. But the meds are working again. I think I can make it out this time.” He smiled a nervous smile, and his face showed a tinge of shame.

“Duncan,” said Tom with hesitation.

“Yes?”

“It was not a dream.”

“I know. You told me. I remember.”

“Yes, but it was no animal. I…I killed a man in front of you,” said Tom and searched Duncan’s face for a reaction. Duncan frowned.

“What? No, Dad. It was a deer. I remember the animal screaming,” Duncan said softly, his eyelids drooping. Tom took the beer from his hand.

“No, son. It was a man. I kept saying it was a deer on the way home so you wouldn’t remember.”

“No. It can’t be.”

“It was. I killed him. You knew him. Do you remember Bob Hayes?”

“Bob Hayes? I remember Bob.” Duncan smiled at the memory. “He always had candy for me.”

“Yes. Yes, he did.” Tom nodded and his eyes filled with tears.

“He kept hurting you and your mother, and I killed him.”

“Why are you saying these things?”

“Because I need to clear my conscience, Duncan. Because Bob was your real father.”

“What are you talking about?”

“We both loved your mother. We both fought for her affection. Bob was the dark, artistic type, and he won her over for a spell. We still spent time together, but Bob got there first. But he was a mean drunk. I helped your mother all I could while she was pregnant, but eventually it became unbearable for her. I took your mother away from Bob, but he was always there, always drunk, and always looking for you.”

Tears rolled down Duncan’s cheeks.

“I can’t move, Dad.”

“I know, son.” Tears rolled down Tom’s face. He stuck the beer bottle into Duncan’s mouth and poured more beer down his throat. “You are in real trouble this time. I can’t save us all – you, Luna, your mother. I’m sorry.” He caressed Duncan’s face. “You must let go to save Luna, Duncan.”

“You are not my father?” Duncan’s tongue slurred. “You drugged me, and now you kill me?” Duncan stumbled to his feet. “You killed my father, and now you want to kill me?”

Tom stood up, towering over Duncan.

“Yes,” he said with resolve. “I protected you your whole life, but now it’s too late.”

“No. I can fix it. I’ll get better, and I’ll talk to the city people. Luna will be safe.”

“No, son. They’ve already killed the cattle and burned the barn. They are coming. I need your life insurance to protect Luna and your mother, otherwise Luna will end up an orphan. You must let go, son.”

“Luna.” Duncan looked at Tom and smiled. “She is something, isn’t she?”

Tom held on to Duncan’s shoulder.

“She is the best of us, son. She is the only future you have.”

“Son?”

“You will always be my son.”

“I’m so sorry, Dad.” Duncan cried in Tom’s arms.

“Me too.” Tom cried in Duncan’s arms.

Drowsy and weak, Duncan pushed against Tom. “I’ll kill you, Dad,” he whispered. “You’re not my father. You’re not Luna’s kin. You’re nothing.” He yelled and shoved Tom. Tom stepped back; Duncan stumbled and his momentum carried him to the edge of the boat, but he steadied himself and turned. Tom was behind him. With tears in his eyes, Tom gave Duncan the last heavy push. Duncan went overboard. Their eyes met for a moment, and then Duncan broke the surface and disappeared in the muddy water. When he surfaced again, Tom watched him swallow water.

“Help me, Dad. Dad… Help…” were the last words the son uttered to his father before the murky water took him.

Tom stood at the bow. His lips were set and fists clenched. The one generous act of saving Helen and Duncan had brought him forty years of crime, violence, and murder.